Way too sweet...

Saturday Rose (my four year old) began feeling run down. I knew this when she asked if she could take a nap after my husband's flag football game ~ while we were still on our way TO the game. This from the child who resists napping any more...

Well, she rested on me much of the day Saturday while her sisters played. She tried to join it but didn't have the spunk she usually does, so preferred hanging out with her more sedentary mommy. Fast forward to Sunday morning ~

Rose comes running into my room, breathless and agitated, shouting "Mommy, wake up!We need to ask God to help me! We need to pray that he will make my throat stop hurting." I smiled and said okay ~ and asked her if she wanted to begin the prayer. She immediately launched into her request, which I always adore since the prayers are so pure and heart felt (like tonight when she was telling God how "next time people will not say 'no, you can't have it' and won't share, but they will say 'you can have it when I am finished with it'").

I prayed with her, and after we finished I asked her how she was feeling. She told me "My nose is better and I am not coughing so much, but he told me he wasn't going to help my throat. He will do that tomorrow."

Wow ~ she not only prays with a full heart, but she listens, too. Complete faith, complete trust ~ absolute agreement with our Lord. I am blessed by her heart and mind. I am touched by her simplicity and love.

And, of course, her follow through. Today she told me ~ "my throat is okay now, God told me it would be." Smiling, she continued getting ready for preschool.

We serve an awesome God ~ Amen?

Confirmed in Christ~

I have been so privileged to be a participant in some very meaningful ceremonies lately; the first was sharing a eulogy at my former father-in-laws funeral last Friday, the next will be speaking on behalf of a dear young friend at his Eagle Scout Award ceremony tomorrow night (which he insisted on having in his church, complete with a hymn ~ I am touched with his faith walk), and the last will be witnessing my niece's confirmation ceremony next weekend.

My brother's family belongs to a Lutheran Church near their home. When my niece Amanda was twelve, her mom looked for a confirmation program that suited her preferences, and her church did not have what she felt was needed. She wanted her daughter to really understand the commitment to Christ that she was preparing to make. They found a Lutheran church in another county that had a good program, and for the past two years Amanda has been taking classes there. It has been a juggle for her folks to get her to the classes in addition to her dance and her brother's soccer, as well as school and family events (does anybody know what I am talking about here?) ;-) but God is the priority, and Amanda has learned and grown so much during this class. Her confirmation day is May 4th (which is also her dad's birthday, which I find pretty neat)...

I was delighted when she asked me to help her select a verse to be confirmed under, as well as to review her statement of faith that she needs to present to the church and Christ during her ceremony. I was incredibly blessed when I read her statement ~ God has worked in her deepening her walk and understanding and I am tickled that she will enter high school next year with her relationship with God more fully integrated into her heart and mind. He is so important to all of us, but my heart has always been particularly tender toward the youth culture of today. The only *help* I provided her for her statement was to question her understanding of a few of her sentences so that I understood what she was saying, and she understood what she was professing. A couple of things were adjusted related to this, but it was more verbage than the heart of her statement. I wanted to share her profession below; she was running it by her pastor this morning; I am pretty sure he will accept it as written...

Jesus Christ is God’s only begotten son, my lord. I believe that Jesus Christ is truly God, existing from the beginning, and also was truly human, willingly emptied of His godliness, and assigned to earth by God the Father, born of the Virgin Mary.

He suffered and died on the cross for me to secure my salvation for all eternity and conquered the devil from being able to convince me into doing the wrong things because he loves me and was willing to sacrifice everything for me. For if I am to do something wrong or make a mistake, I am forgiven and Jesus helps me to come closer to him each and everyday even if I may not realize it.

Through faith and grace alone I will inherit eternal life in God’s Kingdom. I know that I cannot by my own reason or strength believe in Jesus or come to him, but because the Holy Spirit works through me and lives within me, I am able to be called to the Gospel and enlightened with His gifts.

As I walk and talk with Jesus in my Christian faith each day, I know my sins will be forgiven and I will be saved. I know that my redeemer lives and that Jesus Christ is the way to Heaven, the truth, and the life. I shall live triumphantly in heaven because I have received this amazing gift from Jesus for which He has conquered death and that I have accepted his gift to live with him in the Kingdom of Heaven for eternity.

I wish to trust Jesus in everything because I know that he is with me in every step I take. I wish to develop a stronger relationship with Jesus as life carries on and desire to love Jesus with all my heart and all my soul and with my entire mind, and to know that Jesus is my confidence.

Confirmation Verse: John 15:4-5 "Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing."

Amanda, you are a blessing to me and all who love you. I am so proud of the compassionate, kind and thoughtful young woman you have become. You are beautiful both inside and out. I pray that God's Spirit comes to dwell deeply within your heart and soul ~ transforming you from grace to grace each day. I love you dearly, sweet niece, and consider it a privilege to share in your life. May "The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn His face toward you and give you peace."

Amazing Creatures

I saw this while browsing a couple of weeks ago - truly amazing. I wonder what other animals have such great perspective...


Elephant Paints Self-Portrait

I couldn't figure out how to link from the pic (great pic, even, hmm?) but I can add the video link here

Enjoy one of God's masterpieces ~

By God's Design

I love how God is in the little things every day. When we forget He is sovereign and cares about our every need, (well, I do that often enough, you may not) He sends us a gift of experience to show us that He truly is orchestrater of all things.

Today (actually, last week now since I am finishing this post from a draft) I went to a ladies Bible study I had not been attending regularly. I did not do the homework, though I have the book; I didn't even know what week they were on. When I woke up, my intention was not to go, but to stay home and catch up on the many things that needed to be done...but as my morning geared up today, I felt God leading me there, so I changed plans.

The study itself was wonderful (Beth Moore study, this week about submitting to Christ's yoke and allowing Him to be the potter in our lives - very good teaching and inspiring thoughts), but the week's topic was not the main reason I was called to be there (I had thought perhaps it would be). At the end, as I was preparing to leave, one of the ladies asked if there was anywhere in town to purchase dyeable shoes for a formal wedding. Many ladies shared ideas and information, but each was something she had already tried (with the exception of ordering online, but her feet are hard to fit and she needed them by this weekend). She had been to the local store that was suggested, where another lady had just purchased a pair last week, and was told by the manager that they did not have any.

Would you believe (well, of course you would believe, but this tickles me!) that I had seen a pair in my daughter's garage cubby just days before, and had taken note of it for some reason. They had been playing dress up and pulled out some old shoes I had worn in a wedding, that I had never dyed, that had been in one of the kids closets for YEARS. The girls had only recently moved them down to their dress up box, and who knows how they got outside where I would see and notice them...

I asked what size she needed, of course it was my exact size. I encouraged her that this must be the reason I had arrived and had seen the shoes a few days prior - because God was saving them for her. She wasn't certain as she had specifics - She couldn't wear high heels, and also required a looser fit in the back as she had a brace that needed to be fit into the right shoe. I was just certain this would work out for her since it was such "coincidence" all the way around. Sure enough, they fit perfectly, were comfortable with the brace, and she was amazed and delighted. I smiled so widely as she drove away. God is SOOOO good to us! It tickles me when he answers our needs that way.

When sharing this with a friend the next day, she shared her story of His divine prompts. She had been grocery shopping the day before, had been buying milk and decided to buy a gallon extra of her regular brand. Now, she has never bought extra, but recently our grocery store has been going through renovations and she had forgotten milk once because of not seeing it on her regular route through, so she felt prompted to get another gallon and just assumed it was because she was concerned she might forget again before renovations were completed (as they have moved the milk two or three times at this point).

She was just completing checkout when the lady behind her, who looked very frazzled with two toddlers and fatigued eyes said "Oh, no, I forgot to get milk..." Jenny looked at her and said "What kind do you buy?" Of course, same brand, same type (1%) ~ Jenny smiled, handed her the already paid for gallon, and told her to have a wonderful day ~

The God we worship is amazing. Each day He reminds me more deeply how much we are incredibly loved. Wow. I am thrilled to be a part of His divine plan, and so blessed to be used at times. Thank YOU, most gracious, magnificent One. Your are beyond compare! Bless You.

The Gift of Submission

I have been reading some wonderful books lately ~ wonderful in how they are written, and wonderful in how they help me refocus on what is real and eternal. In Mary Kassian's book Women, Creation and the Fall, she states:

"Submission is the key concept to understand, for everyone is called upon to submit to God (James 4:7-10, Hebrews 12:9), and all at one time or another must submit to human authority. Believers who cannot submit to human authority do not know how to submit to God, for it is God who demands submission within human relationships. Conversely, believers will be ineffective leaders, incapable of fulfilling human authority roles, until they learn to submit to others. Submission is for everyone."

Jesus gave us the divine example for this ~ despite being God himself, he submitted himself to God's order ~ often stating that "I do nothing on my own, but speak just what the Father has taught me...I always do what pleases Him." (John 8:28-30).

If Jesus himself was always submissive to our heavenly Father, how much more should we be seeking to humble ourselves! How can we begin to know what is good and right and God's perfect will if we are colored by our culture and jaded by our own feelings and thoughts? The paragraph quoted above was referenced in Barbara Hughes' book Disciplines of a Godly Woman, which I have been enjoying tremendously. God has illumined me to senses that I had not (in my own self-centered approach to relationship with Him) fully considered. Mary's words are written near the beginning of a chapter on the discipline of submission. While reading this chapter, words and scripture leaped out at me and burned in my soul. I found myself excitedly putting the book down several times to begin writing down the scriptures that I so obviously needed to meditate upon and learn for deeper understanding.

The scripture in John, quoted above, is one I have mulled over throughout the years. I have understood its intention intellectually as well as softly in my heart, but have never grasped the depth and intricacies of its worth. What jumped out at me first, causing me to pause to re-read what I had been absorbing in this chapter, was this ~

"During the days of Jesus' life on earth, He offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the One who could save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverent submission." (Hebrews 5:8)."

Get that! Jesus was heard BECAUSE HE WAS SUBMISSIVE!! Wow! I would have assumed He was heard because He was God ~ but, NO! That is clearly shown to be not true. Even Jesus Christ, God's own son, was listened to because He loved and submitted to the Father (not to mention that God did not honor all of His requests, either ~ but that is another topic).

Our instinct is to please and serve ourselves. It is natural in our bodies and mind. We easily rebel against anything that is not pleasing to us. Submission is something we must work on learning and refining. If even Jesus Christ, God's sinless son, had to obey, how much more do I, a wretched, sin-filled human, need to depend upon God to come into obedience? Jesus' prayers reveal the intensity of His desire to submit to God's will, no matter the cost. I have to look at myself and wonder if I am anywhere near that pure of heart. Do I seek God's will no matter the cost to myself? Do I humble myself in prayer in order to be heard by the Creator of the universe?! I fall so far short of this glorious opportunity. I don't think it is in me to be so willing to give up all that I am for Him. Yet all that I am comes from Him, and is for His glory and pleasure. Thank God He provides us with the desire as well as the ability, provided we seek Him to do so.

What privilege we have to be allowed to speak to God on such a personal and intimate level! What grace He has given us to allow us to be called His children and friend! If I truly seek to be a godly woman, I must fervently pray each day that I will submit to God's will and not my own desires or ways...and I must mean it. I must reject the popular cultural myth that happiness comes from putting myself and my percieved needs near the top of my list of things. Though I am fairly adept at putting my children's needs before my own, and serving my husband at his requests, I still tend to think my desires are important.

What I must seek to remember is that God knows my desires ~ He has placed many of them in my heart ~ and He longs to fulfill me. My fulfillment will not come through my own desires, and His longings for me are not ones that sacrifice holiness or godliness. He takes no pleasure in fulfilling desires that will lead me to misrepresent His divine witness in my life. I am created to work for Him ~ through Christ Jesus enabling me, empowering, guiding and directing with His Spirit. Oh Lord, please let this be forefront upon my mind and heart. May my prayers be heard by You, that You may make all things in my life truly "good." May my heart be a sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving for all that You are and all that You give...and all that You have given, that we might be holy and righteous before you. Thank you, dear Lord. Bless you and Praise You. May my heart's only will be to lift you up and serve Your holy Name. Amen.

A Week of Things ~

It has been one of those weeks where God has been the anchor as I have had to seek Him to keep my emotions on an even keel in order to support the family members around me. I have not been perfect, but He has been faithful. I am so grateful that I have Him to turn to...

Last Thursday evening we had a tragedy in our home. Our dear hamster, Cookie, not only escaped her cage, but also escaped Michelle's room ~ and the cats found her before we even knew she was gone. I can't begin to explain the pain I had from that...Michelle was absolutely devastated and I didn't know how to comfort her. I was even more devastated with guilty feelings as I should have considered that she does not do well in focusing when her step-siblings are here (things are much more chaotic and off schedule, and they had arrived on Tuesday last week). I also knew this new habitrail home she got for her birthday was less secure (the hamster had escaped a couple of times, but usually when in my room with the door closed so it didn't amount to life challenges). I should have made the executive decision to bring Cookie back to my room during their visit. I really struggled that evening with the sadness of my daughter, and my own lack of foresight. It was nearly excruciating. Even now I feel terrible ~ Cookie trusted us to care for her and she was totally behaving normal, as were the cats. It was strictly error in caretaking. Owww...

That same day in the earlier afternoon, my stepson had recieved a call from his mother telling him that he would probably be going to a military (or similar to this, I couldn't tell from the web site and he didn't know much) high school. He was devastated ~ but trying to rally and make the best of it. He is not a difficult kid by any stretch of the imagination. He is quite obedient and works hard ~ but the County in Florida where he lives has mediocre public schools and they have many private school options that can be "lotteried" for students. They don't cost extra, just require securing a position. The school he was won placement in was one of the two his folks had put his name in for. He had really wanted to go to the local public school, play in the band, and perhaps try out for football (which, from the appearances, was not as bad as some, but I don't live there so cannot know), but they were not for the extracurricular activities, and had recently told him they changed their mind in allowing that school as an option.

He has been to three different schools in the four years he has lived in Florida. Now he will probably be moving to another school where none of his friends will be following (as he did when he entered his current middle school from his first middle school). My heart was sad for him - he expressed feeling trapped and defeated, but then rallied and said that it would probably be great...and there was nothing I could say except that he should submit it to the Lord in prayer. Bless him, oh Lord - guide his heart and mind and direct his paths.

The next day my mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital with congestive heart failure. We were supposed to go visit she and my father-in-law to share dinner and celebrate my stepdaughter's birthday on Saturday afternoon as she hadn't been feeling up to joining us at our house ~ instead we visited her in the hospital Saturday morning. She actually looked better than she had on Wednesday when the kids visited her home while I worked, but she wasn't doing great. Today is six days from her admission date and I just got off of the phone with her; she was discharged home an hour ago. Originally she wanted to go home on Sunday. Her time on earth is shortening ~ only God knows the hour, but she has been struggling with many health ailments over the past few years, and visits to the hospital getting closer together, healthy days fewer. I keep praying she can release it all to our Lord and draw closer to Him ~ she is so unhappy with her health status and resigned to feeling bad. It is not fun for older people whose bodies are shutting down ~ she suffers from lupus, diabetes, and heart challenges (all related). I wish I could do more, but it is in His hands.

My stepdaughter got a call on Saturday informing her that she needed to choose which two of her family's five cats she wanted to keep. Apparently they were making too many messes and costing too much time/energy and expense for her parents. My heart grieved as I watched her struggle to come to grips with the terrible news as well as try to decide which cats had the best chance for being adopted out again by a family once they were given to the shelter. This was so hard for her - she is truly an animal lover. She had cried for nearly a day during her last visit when we told her that we had lost a calf over the winter (one that she had fed two times during her Thanksgiving visit, and seen once at Christmas). She is tender toward God's creatures - it is one of her beautiful gifts. I pulled her into my arms after she got done sharing the news...and cried with her in my heart - I really could not say anything that would help. Oh, the angst of a mother's heart. I can't describe what was going through my being - Praise God that He knows our hearts and hears the depths of prayers we cannot even speak.

On Sunday evening, Michelle got home with a bit more pep and distraction than usual. She had eaten foods containing milk products for both lunch and dinner on Sunday. (Which we had discovered at the end of December she is highly allergic to). This not only made home challenging, but school for her on Monday and yesterday was more difficult. She could not stay as focused and could not think as clearly. She tends to be more anxious and internally agitated as well as not sleep good. She also wets her bed for three nights each time she ingests anything cotnaining a milk product (even chocolate ~ it takes that long to get out of her system). This after she had been dry for nearly two full weeks was not fun for her. My former husband has always thought me to be rigid and wrong with the protective efforts I have instilled around Michelle related to foods. He has never fully complied with her dietary needs in the past which I had given up explaining, but this one I have been really clear about. I do believe he tries pretty hard but he is not fully understanding. I can understand how hard it is to get it re: what happens to a child related to foods if you are not living with her full time ~ but I wish he would honor things any way. I feel so badly for Michelle when she loses her abilities simply because of something she has ingested...and that it always takes so long for her to bounce back (three days is a long time for a child). It seems unfair ~ but not an unusual product of divorce. Praise God that He is faithful to deliver us, heal us, and bind up our broken hearts. Hallelujah that He is sovereign and wise.

Now, on the good news front (and there were many, many good moments over the last week, too - please don't misunderstand! I am just tired from the trying ones). Rose is doing better with the "loss" of her siblings this time around. She had so much anxiety around them coming to visit (counting the seconds and saying that we are not a full family until they arrive, telling me that she does not like caring because it hurts...). People from our church have been praying for her heart this time ~ Oh Lord, thank you that You answer our prayers and care for the smallest details of our lives. I am so blessed to see less stress and heartache than I have seen in the past in Rosie's actions and adjustments. Oh, thank you that we have a friend in heaven who knows us and cares for our every need. I am so blessed to be in Christ. I would not know how to begin to deal with daily life without Him. Thank you, Lord Jesus, for all you have done for us. May I look at my daily challenges as opportunities to grow and glorify You. Amen.