Contentment

I have not posted in awhile - have had many great ideas and events to share, but never got organized enough to download them from my mind and heart to the keypad...and then they were gone ~ whoosh ~ as happens frequently in my life. God gives me such glimmers of wonder and delight so often (I thank Him for that!!!) and insights or revelations that are really neat or meaningful...I would like to get back in the habit of writing them down. I have been out of journaling for awhile, among other things that have fallen out of practice ~ I am striving to return to self-discipline for these things...had some *moments* of return this summer, but overall still way off. Ah, but I digress...

So last weekend I was attending a planning meeting for an upcoming event, and after arriving about an hour late based upon some unexpected and distressing "turbulence" in my home that morning, I settled in to participate in the day (I had listened to a terrific CD from Integrity, given to me by a dear friend, Lorna, a couple of years ago ~ it got me right back into a better state of mind and heart as I was driving to my meeting place) :-)

Anyway, a question was asked (as an ice-breaker) "If you had a day, and money was no object, how would you spend it?" (or something to that effect)...My mind first went to the orphans in Haiti ~ they are found in the gutters sometimes, mere infants without hope ~ and I had a desire to serve them. My husband and I know a couple who own/run an orphanage in Haiti and are always looking for help as they live here and eke by while traveling there and doing what they can when they can. My own family of origin also has ties to Haiti with medical missionaries and some pastors who had hearts for there ~ but, here is the kicker, I hadn't anticipated this being what would come to mind.

So, as others were talking about some GREAT escapes (believe me, many of them sounded terrific!) ;-) I kept searching my heart for a different idea for me (one that was more fun and lighthearted), but this persisted. Each time I thought about alternatives (e.g. taking my family to Norway to see my relatives and travel around the country visiting all of my cousins and viewing the incredible scenery...or going to a tropical island and having a pampered vacation...or paying off my home ~ or even purchasing a home that is more typical of what I am familiar from childhood and family...)...I couldn't experience them as *important* to me, really.

For instance, the trip to Norway is something I have wanted to do as it is too expensive to travel with the seven of us, in general, that far. Last time I visited was in the summer of 1997, which is a long time ago considering I used to spend much of my summers there while growing up. One would think this would be my priority ~ but I figured that the Lord could provide for that opportunity again one day, as well as for the other things I mused about such as beaches and other travels ~ and the orphanage I would NEVER be able to do for it what I would like...not on my own or with the lifestyle I currently lead, as it stands now (I shouldn't say Never as God IS the God of amazing things). God has always provided for the daily, with a bit extra thrown in for fun ~ I imagine HE will continue to do so :-)

So then I began musing ~ I have had SO many incredible opportunities and experiences that many don't get to enjoy. I have traveled all over the world, been independent since the age of 16 and have had a adventurous streak since I was a child. I am as at home at a formal event with black tie and gowns (you know the kind; appetizer, salad, soup, lemon sorbet to cleanse the palat, main course, dessert, coffee...lots of chit chat and such, some dancing...) as I am hanging out with my old redneck friends in their garage, chit chatting over a barrel filled with fire for warmth (here's the picture - cowboy hats and worn jeans, women in tight tank tops, men in plaid shirts...cans of Budweiser abundant in sight, all working together to build an ultralight airplane that will have its maiden voyage the owner's tree farm in Charlottesville).

I have been to plays in New York and Washington DC, concerts, benefit events, art shows, etc. I have played on boats and watercraft on all kinds in rivers, oceans and waterways in many different places - even cruising the intercoastals in Florida's neat, amazingly expensive areas in a fun and fancy speedboat (with a male friend who promised me he would buy me this INCREDIBLE house there if I married him...hahaha). I got to ride the railways and travel Europe via the Eurarail passes as a teen living in Belgium ~ spent the night in a bar on a table with girlfriends while returning to Belgium from touring Amsterdam and Holland...I also skied the alps (and took lessons from a really good swiss skier) among other locations while living overseas.

I have seen sunsets and sunrises on both Pacific and Atlantic coasts, alone as well as with friends and loved ones...I even drove up to see the sunrise over Mt. Rushmore one day (another VERY interesting adventure I chose to partake in). I have traveled through or in most of the States, and lived in several ~ enjoying many different parks, rivers, lakes, beaches, mountains, etc. I have been to stock car races, horse races and hound races (dressed a bit differently for each one ;-) ), I have visited many beaches, been scuba diving, snorkeling, swam with dolphin and took pictures of some incredible sea life (I used to want to be a marine biologist). I have fished, been to rodeos, flown in a twin engine plane with a friend who had a ranch in Colorado, and hiked amazing mountains. I have even rappelled and rock climbed (limited) as well as shot rifles and pistols. I have attended a variety of outdoor concerts and dance events (Riverdance is amazing), as well as indoor rock concerts and garage band events. I have written songs for friends garage bands, published poems and even had one put to music and produced...

What more could I ask for? There is so much more I have experienced - it just came back to me in snippets as I sat there musing at the meeting. God has been so good to me. I grew up with so many opportunities, had great support for schooling and extra-curricular events, got to travel with my family and visit many theme parks, historic monuments, etc...what more could I really want?? Since college (which I started at barely 17 since I couldn't wait to move on to independence, and graduated a year early so I could get out and know more of the world) I have been allowed so much more as well. I have experienced the position of director for a few companies, as well as worked as the lowest man on the totem pole. I have also served in pizza joints at night to pay bills while working forty hours per week as an intern post college to complete my training...I have gotten many neat alternate work experiences than what I have been privileged with during my cool career. I have worked as a vet assistant, a dispatcher, a movie theater employee (at a tiny theater), a Wendy's employee (back in the day of "try our hot and juicy" - ugh), an adminstrative assistant for a college summer school dean (that was very busy), a paper girl, an editor, and a church youth director... Whatever it is to be, I follow that lead as has been my way...

As for extra curricular through high school and college, I have enjoyed cheerleading, soccer (men's team in high school as they didn't have a girls team overseas), basketball, volleyball, student council, sorority participation (and several offices with that), and many clubs. I have taken ballroom dance lessons by myself (fun when you get to learn with the instructor!), household maintenance classes, auto mechanic classes, and was working toward a PhD in two areas before quitting my studies while my current marriage got underway. Now I study when I can, read voraciously, and love spending time with my kids as well as retreating to aloneness in my gardens or on the back deck in the mornings...something about the sound of birds and quiet is so peaceful and amazing. :-)

So, I have been given so much - so incredibly much...that to even ask for more that is frivolous seems unnecessary and so incredibly selfish. I am so grateful for my life thus far as I have experienced just about everything I have ever wanted to try. Giving to those who have had nothing but struggle seems like such a blessing, and is incredibly freeing to my spirit to consider. Overall, though some things are not as I would desire in my life, I am wholly content with all that God has provided me over the years...and I trust fully that He will continue to provide. Praise Him ~

Why God Made Moms

I had some fun this year for Mother's Day, and had my kids fill out a questionnaire that I had found in an email that was circulating. I wanted to share, some of their answers are downright funny :-)

M is 11, K is 8 and R is 5 ~

1) Why did God make mothers?
M - To take care of us
K - So we could be born
R - So the kids could listen to their moms and listen to the Lord, the Christ

2) How did God make mothers?
M- Through a rib of a man
K - He took the rib out of the man and made a woman
R - With His powers

3) What ingredients are mothers made of?
M - Love, warmth, sadness, happiness, much much more
K - a rib
R - bones and hair

4) Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
M- because she was meant for me
K - So we could be born and love on her and so we could have a mom
R - Cause He thought she was Christ-ly

5) What kind of little girl was your mom?
M - Quiet, shy, pretty, sensible, Christian
K - nice one
R - I don't know cuz I was the last to grow up, Max did cuz he was the first one! (Max is 15)

6) What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
M - About him, example: his history and what he was like
K - what he likes
R - that he was Christ-ly

7) Why did your mom marry your dad?
M - Because #1 she thought God had picked him out, and #2 God actually picked the 2nd one
out
K - so she could have a child
R - cause he was Christ-ly

8) Who's the boss at your house?
M - Daddy Bo, mommy
K - Mom and Dad
R - Jesus and Mom and Dad

9) What's the difference between moms and dads?
M- well, one's a man and one's a woman (when queried further...) dads play different, moms
do more at home
K - one is a boy and one is a girl
R - that dads are tall and moms are a little bit shorter

10) What does your mom do in her spare time?
M - read bible, pay bills, get disturbed (when asked what she meant by this, she reminded
me that she or someone else was always interrupting me with needing something) :-)
K - read, rest, get on computer
R - Enjoys reading her Bible

11) What would it take to make your mom perfect?
M - Nothing she already is!
K - Powers
R - wearing a dress and a skirt and telling me what to do, doing everything

12) If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
M - I wouldn't change a hair on her head
K - Make us get everything we want
R - Changing her to not ever be angry...or my dad either

Blessings to all, I am laughing again as I type this. Children are such delightful joys! :-)

My Descent into Hell by Howard Storm

I just finished a really interesting book...I found it randomly when browsing through Amazons vast library of options (getting my summer reading list together) :-) While the book has some parts I question, the overall theme is amazing and compelling...I wanted to share bits and pieces that struck me as I started trying to process the profundity of the author's words.

In a chapter about the past and the future (wars and such), he states "the way to prevent war is to love aggressively and care for all people. Sufficient wealth, food and resources exist for every person in the world. Wars result not because there is a scarcity of resources, but because of our desire to possess resources to the exlusion of others. God loves every man, woman, and child on this planet more than we love our own children. God wants all people to have food, shelter, meaningful work, and an opportunity to be creative; to learn the truth, have freedom from fear, have self-esteem, be procreative, live in community, find complete joy, trust in God, and become the wonderful people that God created us to be.
"Our purpose is to know and do God's will in this life, and we do this when we love one another as God loves us. Every person without exception needs to be loved by us. This is the most difficult and most important lesson of our life. this is what has shaped the past and this is what will create the future. We have failed to learn this fundamental lesson that God has been teaching us from most religious traditions since the beginning of human consciousness."

In another chapter..."The love of God, the love of neighbor, and the love of self are inseparable parts of a whole that cannot be divided. Without the love of God, there cannot be true love of another. It is only through the overarching Spirit of God that one can love another person. Love comes from God, and relationships not grounded in the love of God are based on the exploitation of other people. Only through love of God can we see the true value and beauty of another person.
"It is impossible to love another person unless we love ourselves. Without the love of God, it is impossible to love ourselves because every human being is aware of their flawed nature and sinfulness. We can find ourselves truly lovable only by receiving the love that our Creator has for us. When there is no love of God, there is only the counterfeit love of narcissism, which is a gross attempt to prove ourselves lovable. The only authentic love in this world is achieved when there is balance between love of God, love of neighbor, and love of self."

One last thought worth sharing (in the same flow, though much further in the book)..."Jesus Christ commanded his disciples to love one another as he loved us. I don't know how to practice this radical kind of love in a world that exploits love. One who takes Jesus Christ's command seriously must live in constant tension with the world. The fervent desire of the Spirit of God working in and through the church to make the world more loving is thwarted by the passion of the world to undermine the church.
The Bible teaches - from Book of Genesis to the Book of Revelation - that each of us is free to choose whether we are proponents of God's will or opponents of God's will. The question is: Are you seeking God's will or are you not? Knowing and doing God's will is the curriculum in this life. The church, as flawed as it may be, is the instrument to help us know God's will. The church is the closest we will get to God outside of heaven. The secular world is the place where we are sent to do the work of the Spirit of Christ."

I really enjoyed reading Mr. Storm's book...will likely re-read it as it is filled with testimony speaking toward God's love and truths ~

Blessings ~
Christie

An Unexpected Delight

My sister emailed me this time last week (Thursday or Friday) and asked "how would you like some company for Easter?!" Would I?!! Of course!!!

Fast forward - I was delighted to pick she and two of her children up at the airport on Wednesday, her hubby and other two kiddos arrived by car a couple of hours later. My sister and her husband are following God's prompts to decrease material comforts and increase eternal focus, so they have sold their house in Chicago (amazingly fast ~ so they are renting back until June) and are on an avid search for *where* the LORD would have them go.

I have been praying for them that God would lead, while trying to keep my desires out of the picture. God gave me a vision, which I shared with them (which looked like a possible South Carolina perspective, and they did have a head hunter from there contact them) but more recently He has clarified some things from that which suggest it might actually be Virginia which would be awesome to me...I am all the more eager to see what He has in store. Yesterday and today she has been interviewing with five different OB/GYN practices in Fredericksburg, which is not far away. She loves the town and the hospital, but hasn't yet gotten a good feel for her fit. Today was the day she was to speak to the doc that she had sensed a good connection with over the phone. The sense I got in my prayers was the Richmond area, which is further away, but still relatively close (especially compared to Chicago) ~ however, I really just pray the right door will open, and His perfect plan will be illumined in time (they have also had a good sense at a location in Texas)

While she is in Fredericksburg, I have been delighted to have my niece, nephews, and brother-in-law staying with us. I so enjoy their company and really miss them between visits (all of them). This pic was taken Thursday morning (Lexie, their youngest, was still sleeping)

What a blast we have had - I have to share them with my brother this evening and tomorrow before they head back to Illinois, but will get to join all of them Saturday evening for an early Easter celebration. I wish they could join us for church on Sunday as I know they would really appreciate our church family, but they will go with my brother's family which is okay, too (do I sound like I hate sharing?) *smile*

So ~ can't wait to see the plan, delighted to share the time. Florida, Texas or Virginia (all places where family exist for them)...in time we shall know. To God be the Glory ~

Fasting for Lent

Discipline seems to be a non-valued quality in our culture these days. As I was reflecting on the current season of Lent and how many denominations encourage Christians to give something up during the days preceeding Easter (television, chocolate, video games...), I realize that this is a good training ground for some people in the area of self-control and drawing closer to God, while just an exercise in religious games for others.

How often, when participating in a Lenten fast, do we really think about why we are giving things up? I know that before I pursued a deeper relationship with the Lord (versus the one I had growing up, where I heard His Spirit nudging me throughout my life as I "tried" to do what was right), I had a pretty *decent* relationship with religion and religious practices. This included attending church, following rules, and taking notes during sermons as a way of trying to understand God, while being somewhat unaware about how church attendance and following these practices drew me closer to God. I often felt closer to God outside of this Sunday attendance practice ~ during my prayer times and hours spent admiring the beauty of His Creation. I sometimes wondered as to how to related what attending church was for, besides the intellectual pursuit of understanding God coupled with the "good feeling" I got while being there.

During those days, when I fasted from meat,ice cream, chocolate, or whatever (during Lent), it was without true understanding of purpose. I did it to agree with the system ~ to participate with "God", and I did it half-focused. Today, though I am not fasting during this Lenten season, I fast for different reasons, forgoing various things whenever I feel led by the Lord to do so. I have learned so much about God and myself during these times of fasting; so much more than when I gave something up for Lent...It has been a true delight and a period of growing closer to our Lord as well as loving Him more and being more awed by His power and grace and mercy.

I remember my feelings of amazement during the first few times I "fasted for a day" in order to draw closer to God in obedience. Everything suddenly became so much more tempting, my mind would play tricks on me about what I was missing, how I wouldn't have a chance to taste this or that if I didn't have it (e.g. it always seemed that parents would drop off baked goods or candies for the teachers at the school those days when I was working) ~ I had to actively CHOOSE to deny myself, often telling God "no, You are more important and I am going to honor my agreement." It was truly a bittersweet time as I was getting *nothing* out of the fast that served my conscious fleshly body, and at times felt that it was silly to even be pursuing. Gradually, over time, I discovered that it was during this time that I understood the power God gave to us through His Spirit. I understood the cravings of my body, driven by my mind more often than not and how "taking each thought captive to the obedience of Christ" was a powerful tool of victory in pursuit of sacrificial living...even relatively *small* sacrifice.

Stepping stones...each that we step upon can bring us closer to the edge of ourselves, into the arms of our Heavenly Father...or can topple and roll ~ causing us momentarily to lose our balance and/or bearings, until the path is laid clear before us once again...

Praise God for His stabilizing Hands as we cross our river of stones ~ slowly but steadily approximating Christ's control over our own desires

Do You Know What Faith Is?

I liked this simple summary; wanted to share :-)

A Prophetic Exhortation
By Patricia Bankhead

Date: Mar 17, 2009

Do you not know what faith is? Faith has nothing to do with your eyes or what you can see in the natural. Faith is standing on My promises in spite of your circumstances.

Faith is waiting patiently on Me, no matter how long, until I perform My word. Faith is running to Me when your heart has been broken instead of running to the alcohol bottle. Faith is receiving your healing when there is nothing but pain in your body. Faith is knowing I will provide when there is no food on the table. Faith is not worrying when you hear bad news. Faith is when you stand up face-to-face with your problems and say, "I am more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus."

Faith is walking in My victory; it is believing in an manner that ushers forth the mighty move of My hand that this generation so longs to see.

Abba

God is SO in Control

I was reading Genesis this week, and was enjoying the story about Abram and Sarai again...How God told Abram he would have a son from whom would come descendants as numerous as the stars (I am not sure I would believe that if I were over 80 and childless, frankly)....That they had trouble believing is not even in question here to me, and after several years I would imagine that of course Sarai felt like she was not capable of fulfilling the promise (and perhaps thought she wasn't qualified, since God had promised her husband, not her)...

So goes Sarai to take matters into her own hands and tell her husband that the her maidservant could bear this anointed son....It would appear, as well, that Abram agreed with her that perhaps *she* was the problem in the fulfillment of His promise...

Do I ever do things like this? Take over when it *appears* that what God has promised me might not be happening and what I believe about my inability makes more sense than what God has said? Do I doubt His very word to me ~ the Creator of our Universe, Alpha and Omega, Father of all, capable of all things?! I have to laugh at that questi0n as I often do doubt ~ Lord increase my faith!

However, what was most interesting to me this week was the longer range of God's plan and perfect provision ~ let me share with you some of Chapter 15 (before Sarai takes matters into her own hands)

4 Then the word of the LORD came to him: "This man will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir." 5 He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be."
6 Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness. "

God then cuts covenant with Abram as a binding agreement to be responsible for the fulfillment of what He has promised...

12 As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him. 13 Then the LORD said to him, "Know for certain that your descendants will be strangers in a country not their own, and they will be enslaved and mistreated four hundred years. 14 But I will punish the nation they serve as slaves, and afterward they will come out with great possessions. 15 You, however, will go to your fathers in peace and be buried at a good old age. 16 In the fourth generation your descendants will come back here, for the sin of the Amorites has not yet reached its full measure."

This was the part that stood out to me...God is talking about the next FOUR HUNDRED YEARS.
He also states fourth generation they would return ~ Let's count...Abraham begat Isaac, Isaac begat Jacob, Jacob begat Joseph...one, two, three...during the fourth generation (Manasseh's), Moses delivered Israel (descendants of Jacob, who was renamed "Israel" by God) from the Egyptians. They had been enslaved for just over 400 years.

Now, God got Israel to Egypt through Joseph and his brothers (sons of Jacob). They became slaves after Joseph died, and were mistreated until Moses came along, upon God's hand, and got them out of Egypt to return to their "promised land."

If God can plan so much in advance, knowing all that would transpire and orchestrating it *just so* to work in His perfect timing, despite our waywardness, lack of faith, and all other sinful life choices, how much more can He walk us through the current economic and dark times?! Praise God that He is always faithful to His promises ~ "But Christ is faithful as a son over God's house. And we are his house, if we hold on to our courage and the hope of which we boast "(Hebrews 3:6) Amen?